Pillow Talk

I like boys who are happy with two girls and not one.

Guys cheat on pretty girls with ugly girls because looks aren't everything. Perhaps the pretty girl is a bitch ass, herpes ridden whore who has no respect for the guy's personal space or freedoms.

You rejected me for someone else, but i will deal with it because i am not a self centered bitch and understand that not everyone loves me the most.

As a matter of fact, the world does revolve around me. BECAUSE I'M SO FAT.

I am god.

I like guys who don't drop everything just to make their girlfriend smile. Don't be a demanding, self centered bitch. They have lives too.

The Truth About Evolution

This is what happens when you use too much punctuation.

Twlight sucks.

Fear leads to anger.
Anger leads to hate.
Hate leads to curly hair.
Curly hair leads to curly fries.

To-night

Bitch, i put dashes wherever the fuck i want.

I'm invincible!

Seriously. Swine flu can fuck off.

The Haunting

I want to go scuba diving in a kelp forest.

The Runaway Heart #1: Pilot

Bears vs. Polio.

15. What are some of the major issues facing the world today?

Bears. Bears are a major issue facing the world today, and every other day. That and the deterioration of the American morals and standards that we hold so close to our hearts.

Do you know how many people are injured, physically and mentally, each year by bears? I don't, but i'm sure it's a lot. More than polio. Well, maybe not more than polio but, let's face it, bears are much more scary and intimidating than polio. Have you ever heard anyone say "OMG! Run! It's polio!" I bet not because polio is a small virus, as opposed to a large, omnivorous caniform with large intimidating teeth. Face it: people just don't run away from polio. They do, however, run away from bears, which doesn't do too much good, seeing as even the slowest bear can run at a speed of 30 mph, as opposed to the fastest human (Maurice Green, at a sprinting speed of 26.7 mph).

In conclusion, it can be safely assumed that bears are the single largest threat facing the world today.